I Choose to Remember

/ Jodi

foggy-snowy-view-cranberry-township-pa-december-2016

I choose to remember
your tender heart,
your innocent smile,
the carefree days of childhood.

I choose to remember
the boy you were
before life stole your goodness…
before difficult circumstances hardened your heart.

I choose to remember
there was a good soul within
the shell the disease stole
and lied to and hid.

I choose to remember
you tried to care,
even though you struggled
to show it.

I’ll try to forget
the things that hurt both our hearts
that you couldn’t recover from
and found other ways.

I’ll try to forget
the things we were told
that broke our spirits
and shattered our souls.

I’ll try to honor
the boy you once were,
the man you tried to be,
the goodness down deep.

I hope your pain is gone,
your soul is free,
your demons slayed,
and that peace is attained.

 

(written the night I learned my brother died this week)

88 thoughts on “I Choose to Remember”

  4. So sorry for your loss. It sounds as if your brother struggled to deal with many demons in his life. I pray he is at peace, and you as well. Your poem is a beautiful tribute.

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  12. I’m glad I read the comments before commenting. I am sorry for this loss. You have honored him greatly. I wish more people showed this kind of love and understanding to those suffering. Be well

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  15. Oh Jodi, I’m so sorry. Please don’t let this loss take away from your birthday. Celebrate with all the fun you have shown us on this blog, blow out those candles with a happy wish for yourself and end this year with your best smile!

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  18. Heartfelt sympathy and friendship, dear Jodi. ♥ Your beautiful words are healing ones. I hope you will reread your beautiful words as often as necessary as you heal your heart. Warmest hugs… and much love. ♡

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  21. So sorry for your loss, Jodi. I’m sure that despite it all that he knew you loved him and cared for him very much. I’m sure he felt the same for you–despite his inability to convey it. You are right to choose to remember the very best things. Thinking of you today…

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  28. Sometimes words are not enough. So prayers being said. I know you have surrounded your life with love and joy via your husband and children. Hoping all of that strengthens your resolve to remember the good memories….

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  30. Such a deep poem Jodi! It tells of so many challenges Johnny went thru and yes may he be in peace! Treasure the Good and remember the Love!! Hugs and Love my sweet sweet friend.
    Love you

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  34. I’m so sorry, Jodi! Your poem was beautiful and heartfelt. Family relationships can be so complicated, on so many levels. I think you are very wise to choose to remember the good in your brother, and the man that he wanted to be. That’s the best way to honor him. You will be in my thoughts and prayers as you cope with this loss. Peace to you, my friend!

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  35. Jodi, I’m so sorry for your loss, and your families loss. It must be very difficult this time of year. Wonderful tribute to him, remembering the good times, not the disease. Praying for you!

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